Monday, September 3, 2012

Bad Eating In Pennsylvania

You know, I've never come back from a vacation and been giddy with all the food choices in my hometown before, especially since my town has a real dearth on good restaurants. And Burger King and the one deep fried fish joint don't count.  
A) Eating from Philly, across Lancaster, in Hershey, and back across to New York was a nightmare. Hardly any restaurants at all, just a few fast food places.  

B) Damn, the people in Pennsylvania are weird looking. First, the majority is super doughy, dumpy, and just plain obese. In Harrisburg, I counted 2 normal looking people, the rest topped the scales from 50 pounds overweight to over 100 pounds overweight. And it's a particular kind of fat. A super soft, slack looking torso with thin legs. I also saw some strangely misshapen...well, they weren't thin exactly older people. They were very soft looking but had flat, almost concave butts and hunched backs with a curved neck. No muscle tone whatsoever. Skinny-fat for so long that they sucked the calcium out of their bones? The Amish are thin but they work off all that flour and sugar mess they eat at every meal plus I've seen their gardens. They're the only ones eating even slightly healthy over there.  

C) I was violently ill every single day we were in Pennsylvania. Every thing I ate made me sick. I'd have eggs and fruit at the hotel but they used the nasty vegetable oil and I'd be needing a toilet after a few minutes. Ate a hamburger, clearly it was full of breading or the wrong oils or something because I'd be sick. I didn't feel better and get my intestines under control until I got back to New York (where the people are thinner and fitter and overall look much healthier) and had a steak and a salad--which I couldn't find in Pennsylvania.  Oddly, New Yorkers look fitter than Californians.  I didn't see a soul in California who I was jealous of at all.  No more hard bodies left, I guess.  Most of them look like they could lose a few and should push some iron around to tighten up. 

Pennsylvanians, y'all eat too much flour and sugar junk and that's why you look so very god-awful. Although, 3 Mile Island could have something to do with it, LOL 


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